August 30th, I didn’t go on Facebook or its substitute, Youtube, for the first time in donkey years. I can’t truthfully say it was any one thing, like will power. It was a combination of it being the right time (after so much of it spent struggling) and having experiences more aligned with what I want to do with my time, like learning languages, planning improvements on the Airbnb residence I manage and being in more regular contact with friends; all of which reinforced a conviction that I don’t need to use these platforms. I’ve been going on them primarily because of the addictive stimulation of novelty.
Similar to what helped me beat my Facebook addiction here, I wasn’t getting what I wanted from YouTube. There was too much vapid popular content and, even the self-help stuff no longer had the same appeal. The latter was not only repetitive, but I felt certain I already had enough of what I needed to become who I wanted, intuitively, perhaps even before I’d started to search.
DAVE
I’d been watching the television series Dave which is entertaining in the way Borat or Stevie from Jackass is – their willingness to be visible in their ways is cringy, but it’s safer to experience shame for them than for yourself. Plus, Dave exists as we all should, uniquely himself. I particularly like Season 2, Episode 3 ‘The Observer’ where he and his buddy get naked together for fun, challenging norms surrounding male heteronormativity in friendships. I’d never seen anything like that before (or since…although, admittedly, this type of behaviour is much more socially permissible for Caucasian men).
My interest in Dave led me to a talk show interview where David Andrew Burd, (writer of the series about whom it is based) talked about posting a music video Ex-Boyfriend and it going viral (it got more than a million views in 24 hours on Youtube). I looked up Lil Dicky (his stage name) on Youtube and watched Lemme Freak (the first music video to appear).
“While millions watched this, extinction crept up upon them.”
It was trite. That didn’t stop it from having 91 million views and 719k likes at the time I saw it. Immediately, I was done. The masses want what I am unwilling or unable to give and “building a community of followers” is just a way for platforms to keep you returning.
Quality not Quantity
Here, I’ve been writing for me with an invitation for you to accompany my journey. I feel like I’ve done what I set out to, documenting the process and I’ve made a few meaningful connections, in whose cases the adage “quality not quantity” applies.
Writing here is one of the things that has helped take me away from my time wasting addictions like Facebook and Youtube. I’m on Instagram, but have only updated it in past attempts to be findable because of my writing, and am glad I never joined others like Snapchat, TikTok or Twitter. I’d definitely have thumb tendinitis and have forsaken eating and dreaming. The messenger apps have been fine, though, for talking to friends, facilitating direct contact with those overseas.
The final frontier in putting aside distractions to face myself is movie and tv series streaming sites.
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